Ever looked at your life
Realizing nothing has gone right?
Ever woken up in the morning
Cursing yourself for doing so?
Even the messages or texts friends send
Letting you know they care
Barely break the barrier of pain
Enveloping you so thoroughly
The words "I love you" are a prop
Becoming merely a last resort
Spewed in hopes that you will have reason
Meaning so little, those words
They beg the question "why?"
If only they knew the innermost thoughts
Would they still love you?
Would they run from this lost cause?
This is my life.
It has been put on repeat
The people rotate over time
After a while the character list thins
Soon I will be left all alone
I might as well get used to the darkness
Each day it gets harder to face myself
Everything Ive become, what I do or don't do
Its all just a lump of disappointment lodged in my throat
No one notices when I shut myself off
I seldom talk to anyone enough for them to notice the break
Those who do notice think of it as a nice holiday from me
I hate the way I am
I wish my friends would find someone better
Its so easy to do
I don't deserve them
I don't understand why they stay